My December
by tinks1389
Summary: Harry Has finally defeated Voldermort, theres only one thing left for the Boy-Who-Lived, to die. Songfic to LP's My december SSHP


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, and I never will! This is HP/SS. Consider yourself warned.

_This is my December  
This is my time of the year  
this is my December  
This is all so clear_

Harry Potter sat in the Astronomy Tower on a Saturday night. Apparently he didn't care if he got caught being out after curfew. He already defeated Voldemort so there wasn't anything he considered dangerous now. He watched the snow falling to the ground with a saddened look on his face. He sighed as a tear trickled down his cheek, 'Why did he have to be so weak?' he thought.

_This is my December  
this is my snow covered home  
this is my December  
this is me alone_

Tomorrow he would put on his fake smile and go back to his fake happy life. Sometimes he wished he wasn't a wizard and he never came to Hogwarts. It has been nothing but hell for him here. He heard someone behind him, light footsteps coming his way. He angrily wiped his tears away and turned around to see who dare interrupt his peace. There stood Severus Snape, the only one he'd ever love.

_And I  
Just wish that I didn't feel  
Like there was something I missed  
And I  
Take back all the things I said  
To make you feel like that  
And I  
Just wish that I didn't feel  
Like there was something I missed  
And I  
Take back all the things I said to you_

"Mr. Potter what in Merlin's name are you doing here at this time of night" Severus walked over to him and looked down on his scrawny figure. Harry gave no answer, "Well?" Severus prompted.

Harry sighed and stood up walking over to the window, "Contemplating suicide sir." Severus gasped and placed his hand on Harry's shoulder, "why?" Was all that the professor could choke out. "My life is nothing but hell, might as well live there. Besides no one would notice anyway."

"No one notice. You're the Boy-Who-Lived, of course they would!" Severus tightened his grip on Harry's shoulder. "Exactly!" Harry screamed. "They would notice the Boy-Who-Just-Wouldn't-Fucking-Die! But who would notice if Harry died?" Harry looked up at Severus with tears in his eyes. "Who?"

_And I give it all away  
Just to have somewhere to go to  
Give it all away  
To have someone to come home to_

This is my December  
These are my snow covered dreams  
This is me pretending  
This is all I need

Severus looked into those emerald green eyes. 'So much like Lily, not at all like James' the Potions Master thought. Finally he broke down, "I would," he said through tears of his own. Harry looked at him as if he were crazy, "what?" Severus smiled, "I said that I would notice if Harry died." Harry looked back out the window.

"When I was little I used to sit in my cupboard and wonder what it was like to be loved, what it was like to have a family, what it was like to be normal, and what it was like to watch the snow. I've only known one of those things, I think I've played in the snow too much lately." Severus frowned, 'a cupboard?' he thought.

"Well Harry, yes I just called you Harry, you've always been loved." Harry looked up at him confused. "Not just by your adoring fans either." Severus bent down to capture Harry's lips with his own.

_And I  
Just wish that I didn't feel  
Like there was something I missed  
And I  
Take back all the things I said  
To make you feel like that  
And I  
Just wish that I didn't feel  
Like there was something I missed  
And I  
Take back all the things I said to you_

Harry pulled back and sighed, "I have to be dreaming" he said as more tears came. "Harry what's the matter? You don't love me, I should have known." Severus put his façade back up. "I'm sorry for wasting your time Mr. Potter, Oh and it would make more of an impact if you screamed while falling out of the window." He said harshly. Harry winced at those words. He knew Severus could never love him. Harry sighed as Severus began to leave. "I do love you Severus Snape."

Severus stopped dead in his tracks and turned around, "No need to lie Potter, I'm the cold hearted bastard remember, I don't have feelings" Severus sneered, "besides what would make you think I want you" Severus knew the words were hurtful but it was his way to make himself hurt less. Severus turned around and left. Harry broke into sobs as he looked at the window he began to sing, "And I give it all away just to have somewhere to go to give it all away to have someone to come home to"

He sighed and climbed onto the windowsill, looking down he saw Severus. His heart began to beat faster. "This is my December," he whispered.

_This is my December  
This is my time of the year  
This is my December  
This is all so clear_

And I give it all away  
Just to have somewhere to go to  
Give it all away  
To have someone to come home to 

Harry took one step and let himself fall out of the Astronomy Tower, and just for effect, he screamed all the way down.


End file.
